Like Kit, your children understand more and feel deeply than you think. Kaya, don’t cut communication with them tuwing may problema ang pamilya. Ilatag ang sitwasyon in a way na maiintindihan nila. Sa tulong nito, magagabayan mo ang understanding nila at hindi ka nila ma-mi-misinterpret. This also reassures them na kahit may pinagdadaanan ang pamilya, wala silang dapat ikabahala.
Here are five tips to foster open and honest communication with your kids, lalo na kung tungkol sa difficult issues and topics:
Hanapin ang right moment
Before anything else, pakiramdaman ang iyong anak if may gusto silang pag-usapan. Kung willing siya, then the time is right. Kung hindi pa sila ready or hindi nila i-bring up ang issue, huwag natin sila pilitin. Instead, let them know na andiyan ka and willing to listen whenever they are ready to talk.
Lying to your kids can harm their trust in you and erode your relationship with them over time. And when you tell the truth, i-ayon ang iyong explanation sa edad nila. Para sa mga kids below 6 years old, gumamit ng simple at madaling maintindihan na mga salita.
Kapag edad 7 to 12 na sila, importante na tulungan silang mas maintindihan ang mga pangyayari by talking about the circumstances of the issue. Meaning, pag-usapan hindi lang kung ano ang nangyari kung ‘di pati bakit ito nangyari. During this time, maganda rin na i-encourage ang critical thinking by asking what their thoughts are about the issue.
Kontrolin ang iyong emosyon
You can be open to your kids about your own feelings without getting overwhelmed or having emotional outbursts. Tandaan, ang usapang ito ay para ma-guide ang iyong anak at bigyan siya ng sense of safety. This is also a teachable moment, dahil pinapakita mo sa mga bata na posible palang mag-express ng takot, kaba, o frustration in a calm and composed manner.
Create a ‘safe space’ when discussing difficult topics
Say things like, “Mahirap pag-usapan ang ganitong mga bagay-bagay, kahit para sa aming mga adults. Let’s just talk. Safe space ito. At sa safe space, puwede kang magtanong o mag-share ng kahit anong gusto mo.” Of course, dahil nag-promise ka na “safe space” ang usapan, panindigan at irespeto ito. Sabi nga nila, respect begets respect.
Give your kids reassurance and support
Reassure your kids na kahit may problema ngayon, they are safe and deeply loved. Let them know na puwede ka nilang takbuhan at gagawin mo ang makakaya mo to protect them. Ipaalala sa kanila na they can talk to you if may hindi sila naiintindihan sa mga nangyayari.
Mommies and daddies, respect, compassion, and trust within the family start with honesty and good communication. Follow these tips at simulan natin ito ngayon.
Stay on Barangay Nestle website’s Barangay Court page to learn parenting tips and the secrets to raising champions in life. Don’t forget to catch the next episode of “My Kid Is A Secret Champion”!
Sources:
https://www.mother.ly/parenting/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-difficult-world-eventsby-age/
